Seasons of the Soul

The Lizard

When it was very hot                                  
The lizard used to crawl up the rock beside me.
He would not move for long stretches of time.   
I would stare at the huge mountains before us,
Then feel very small.
I would place my hand on the lizard                                                      
And he would move a little, then go still again.
And I, too, would go still again.                  
Such little things we were, the two of us,        
Enfolded in all that incandescent grandeur.
~Alix Taylor

Finding Joy

A friend called the other day and complained about her husband’s lack of appreciation for all she does. This issue is not new. My friend has felt resentment all her life, from the time she was a child.  She gives to everyone else out of a sense of duty,  but in the quotient has forgotten the most important recipient—herself. 
 
She grew up thinking that to do things for herself was selfish. Many of us can relate to that. However, if we don’t take care of us and bring things into our lives that give us joy—somewhere along the line, we are going to be angry and resentful for all we do, because others don’t  reciprocate in the way we think they should.

Self-love is not selfish. It is love for the Creator’s handiwork. After all, something much vaster than we created us, and isn’t it our duty to take good care of that gift?
 
In looking at our journey, it is important to consider what brings us joy and happiness. It isn’t the big things that sustain and nourish us.  It is the daily kindness to ourselves that creates a solid foundation so that we can give to others with love and gratitude in the giving. Our cup is so full that what we do takes nothing away from our essential well-being. It merely adds to our sense of joy.

Simple pleasures are important. For me it is a cup of tea in the afternoon, and going into the garden to marvel at the plants, or pluck weeds. This fills me with joy. I also  take into consideration the child part of myself that is very strong. I get colored pens and pencils and draw or paint, and sometimes play at my keyboard. These things bring delight. They make my day enjoyable. There is work, and there is play. There is helping and giving to others, but  always the gift of  treating myself, too.

After talking, my friend determined that the one thing that brings her joy is her animals, for whom she has unconditional love.  We discussed the possibility of her volunteering at the local humane society to bring her special gift  to animals in need. She loved that idea. It was something special just for her.

So for each of us...what brings us joy? Let’s find it and do it!

From Seasons of the Soul print edition, Summer 2003

Attach/Non-Attach

There are moments when my heart swells with an overwhelming sense of beauty.  I am touched by the garden, by a sunset, by the kindness of someone, or the miracle of human nature at its best....and I am able to bless the little animal dead on the road, bless the love that appears to go away, and the death that leaves the place of mother void.     

That place where love is deeply felt is ignited also by splendor...not merely sorrow...but they seem to be two halves of a whole, as Kahlil  Gibran said in The Prophet. While happiness is in your bed, sorrow is at the footboard, and visa versa.

Attach/non-attach...the accordion of one's heart strings....and perhaps those are the very combinations that create the symphony of life. We are not one dimensional. We are not one note. We are all of it.

From Seasons of the Soul print edition, Summer 2003

Sunflowers

They start as a small seed...you know, the kind in a shell with stripes  that  you force open with your teeth. I walked through the garden with my three packets, deciding where to plant them.

I’d pick one up, wish it luck, and push it into the ground, repeating the process again and again until they were all gone. Each day, I walked through the garden to see what was happening, and lo and behold, little sprouts emerged. Some of them grew faster, and others slower. There were 3 different species I’d planted.

I went around the garden counting.  How many sunflowers were there? As summer unfolds, the sunflowers are unmistakable. First, I had to search to find them, but at latest count, there are approximately 35 growing throughout the garden. Some are very tall.

Sunflowers are cute...even before they have the flower part. The leaves are growing very lush and bushy at the top, and wherever the sun is, that’s where the leaves point.

Last night, I couldn’t sleep. There was a full moon, and when I walked into the living room the backyard was flooded with light. The sunflowers were all  reaching out in the direction of the moon, just like they do to the sun. So, they aren’t really sunflowers. Nor moon flowers. They are Light Flowers, and they soak up all that solar/lunar energy to bear seeds that can be eaten and replanted, creating more and more and more.

Sunflowers ...amazing plants.

From Seasons of the Soul print edition, Summer 2003

Part of the Solution

Once a week I go to help my great-aunt who is 96. I do the shopping, the laundry, take her on errands, to doctors, and cook and clean. We enjoy one another’s company in the process, and I always feel good when I leave in the evening because I’ve helped out.

One thing comes up again and again when I go to her apartment complex, and I’ve wanted to write an article about it. Each time I go to the laundry room, there is always excess lint lying on the floor or left in the lint trap of the dryer. Many people just don’t bother to clean up after themselves once they get their clothes. 

Being an observer, I’m always looking for clues surrounding us for insights into life. With the laundry room, I find myself wanting to just leave the lint in the dryer, too...not bother putting it into the garbage...justifying myself because “nobody else does it,” and every time a little voice inside my head gently whispers, “Be part of the solution.”

I argue with that voice. I don’t want to be part of the solution if nobody else does. Yet, when I get willful and leave things, I don’t feel right, so I go back and do the “right” thing, while part of me taunts “ Goodie Two Shoes!”

Funny thing is...I do feel better. Something positive happens to me when I  participate in making things flow more harmoniously. I have a sense of being conscious and of doing my part to contribute to a better world. It starts with the lint trap. It unfolds with the argument in my head, and it completes itself with me doing what ought to be done. It also causes me to look around for more I can do to make a positive difference.

I have come to love Wednesdays with my great-aunt. I enjoy helping her with things that are simple for me but very hard for her now.  She took care of her four story home in San Francisco for many years, and she was immaculate. Age has slowed her down, but she still does what she can. Her apartment is always neat and her patio is clean and inviting. She wants to make her place as nice as possible so it contributes to the attractiveness of the whole complex. 

Picking up after ourselves makes a big difference. Contributing to the betterment of the whole is a unifying experience. It may seem like a little thing, but that weekly battle with the lint tray sort of sums up a lot of our conflicts in life. Isn’t it amazing how small things can point to bigger ones if we’ll pay attention?!

From Seasons of the Soul print edition, Summer 2003

The Sparrow at Starbucks

This is a very good example of a "God-incidence." (similar to what many people call a "co-incidence"). If you take the time to read it, I think you will be glad you did.                

It was chilly in Manhattan but warm inside the Starbucks shop on 51st Street and Broadway, just a skip up from Times Square. Early November weather in New York City holds only the  slightest hint of the bitter chill of late December and January, but it's enough to send the masses crowding indoors to vie for available space and warmth. For a musician,it's the most lucrative Starbucks location in the world, I'm told, and consequently, the tips can be substantial if you play your tunes right.

Apparently, we were striking all the right chords that night, because our basket was almost overflowing. It was a fun, low-pressure gig - I was playing keyboard and singing backup for my friend who also added rhythm with an arsenal of percussion instruments. We mostly did pop songs from the '40s to the '90s with a few original tunes thrown in.During our emotional rendition of the classic, "If You Don't Know Me by Now," I noticed a lady sitting in one of the lounge chairs across from me. She was swaying to the beat and singing along.

After the tune was over, she approached me. "I apologize for singing along on that song. Did it bother you?" she asked.

"No," I replied. "We love it when the audience joins in. Would you like to sing up front on the next selection?" To my delight, she accepted my invitation. "You choose," I said. "What are you in the mood to sing?"

"Well. ... do you know any hymns?" Hymns?
This woman didn't know who she was dealing with. I cut my teeth on hymns. Before I was even born, I was going to church. I gave our guest singer a knowing look. "Name one."

"Oh, I don't know. There are so many good ones. You pick one."

"Okay," I replied. "How about 'His Eye is on the Sparrow'?"

My new friend was silent, her eyes averted. Then she fixed her eyes on mine again and said, "Yeah. Let's do that one." She slowly nodded her head, put down her purse, straightened her jacket and faced the center of the shop. With my two-bar setup, she began to sing, "Why should I be discouraged? Why should the shadows come?"

The audience of coffee drinkers was transfixed. Even the gurgling noises of the cappuccino machine ceased as the employees stopped what they were doing to listen. The song rose to its conclusion.

"I sing because I'm happy; I sing because I'm free. For His eye is on the sparrow and I know He watches me."

When the last note was sung, the applause crescendoed to a deafening roar that would have rivaled a sold-out crowd at Carnegie Hall. Embarrassed, the woman tried to shout over the din, "Oh, y'all go back to your coffee! I didn't come in here to do a concert! I just came in here to get something' to drink, just like you!"

But the ovation continued. I embraced my new friend. "You, my dear, have made my whole year! That was beautiful!"

"Well, it's funny that you picked that particular hymn," she said.
" Why is that?" 
"Well," she hesitated again, "that was my daughter's favorite song."                                                                                                            "Really!" I exclaimed.
"Yes," she said, and then grabbed my hands. By this time, the applause had subsided and it was business as usual... "She was 16. She died of a brain tumor last week."

I said the first thing that found its way through my stunned silence. "Are you going to be okay?"

She smiled through tear-filled eyes and squeezed my hands. "I'm gonna be okay. I've just got to keep trusting the Lord and singing his songs, and everything's gonna be just fine." She picked up her bag, gave me her card, and then she was gone.

Was it just a coincidence that we happened to be singing in that particular coffee shop on that particular November night? Coincidence that this wonderful lady just happened to walk into that particular shop? Coincidence that of all the hymns to choose from, I just happened to pick the very hymn that was the favorite of her daughter, who had died just the week before? I refuse to believe it.

God has been arranging encounters in human history since the beginning of time, and it's no stretch for me to imagine that he could reach into a coffee shop in midtown Manhattan and turn an ordinary gig into a revival. It was a great reminder that if we keep trusting him and singing his songs, everything's gonna be okay.

The next time you feel like GOD can't use you, remember, Noah was a drunk, Abraham was too old, Isaac was a daydreamer, Jacob was a liar, Leah was ugly, Joseph was abused, Moses had a stuttering problem, Gideon was afraid, Samson had long hair and was a womanizer, Rahab was a prostitute, Jeremiah and Timothy were too young, David had an affair and was a murderer, Elijah was suicidal, Isaiah preached naked, Jonah ran from God, Peter denied Christ, The Disciples fell asleep while praying, And Lazarus was dead!

No more excuses now!! God can use you to your full potential. Besides you aren't the message, you are just the messenger.

God bless.

~Author Unknown

Messages from the Garden

I was doing summer weeding in the garden, and as I worked, watching the weeds grow after only having picked them a few weeks before, it dawned on me that weeding is as much an ongoing part of life as everything else. Somehow we have the idea that if we’ve done something once, it should stay “done.” Yet, a garden is alive, as is our dwelling...where dust accumulates and crumbs spill on the floor. Cleaning and clearing are always going on in nature, and we need to realize that the same holds true for us.

We eat, digest, and eliminate waste. We don’t do these things just once – they are a daily routine. So, in the scheme of things, life is always dynamic - always a process. We are in the building up stage or the breaking down stage. We are planting AND weeding. We are walking through our clean surroundings AND messing them up at the same time. The dishwasher is loaded - then the dishes are cleaned and unloaded, and the process takes place again and again.

Instead of bemoaning things never fully done for “good,” we can recognize and appreciate the gift of movement. We grow into ourselves through the changes and the repetition. It takes us time to see the full gift of life’s annoyances. But once we do, we can smile with appreciation. Here we are: the flower—the weed. Not “either/or,” but “both/and.”

From Seasons of the Soul print edition, Summer 2002

Career Advice From A Former CEO

Dick Kazan is an amazingly versatile individual who has an inspiring newsletter that shares stories of people who have overcome adversity or other obstacles to become successful in many different areas. Here are some of his suggestions based on his career as a CEO. I heartily recommend you also read his newsletter: www.kazantoday.com       From my experience as a former CEO, and as a writer and a former radio talk show host who has shared numerous stories of success, the following 7 Practices could work wonders for you:  1)    Keep A Positive Attitude: No-one wants to be around those with bad attitudes. Bad attitudes are a key reason why corporations, law firms, sports teams and movie and television studios dump talented people despite their contributions. Instead of having a bad attitude, be a positive force and watch how people gravitate to you.  2)    Don’t Wallow In Self-Pity: When you get a bad break or make mistakes, acknowledge them, learn from them and move on. Don’t blame others and don’t complain. Bad breaks and mistakes are necessary for your personal growth.  3)    Avoid Negative Topics: Most people already know about the crime rates, bad economy or other terrible events. If you must discuss something negative, also tell people what you are doing to help solve the problem, even if it is as basic as a charitable contribution.   4)    Respectfully Disagree. If you have a difference of opinion, don’t tell that person he or she is wrong. Nobody wants to be told they are wrong for it makes them feel bad and angers them, it doesn’t change their opinion. Instead acknowledge what they said, thank them for their opinion and if you must comment, politely offer an alternative perspective.  5)    Don’t Be A Know It All: Neither you nor I nor anyone else knows it all. With a positive attitude we can learn from each other, for there is always more to learn in life.   6)    Be Sensitive To Your Non-Verbal Communication: We all speak volumes in what we don’t say. A frown, a stare, a head nod that says no, a sarcastic laugh, rolling one’s eyes or other unspoken responses define us to others.   7)    Display A Happy Face And Speak In A Happy Voice. Uplift your voice and seek all that is good in others, while being attentive to them and verbally reassuring. Add a little friendly laughter and it is a winning combination.  Take this advice and you will be amazed at the wonderful difference it makes for you. www.kazantoday.com                              In the next KazanToday:  The incredible story of the co-founder of the U.S.’s first special needs adoption agency.

Prayer for Protection from Daisies

 

 

Spare me, O Lord,
from a garden overrun by only daisies

A lake infested
with nothing but trout and swans

A forest where just
maple trees grow.

 

Deliver me, O God,
from a world where

Everyone looks like
me, talks like me,

Thinks like me and
totally agrees with me.

 

In your infinite
wisdom, my Lord and my God,

You fashioned the
stars, planets, galaxies

And people where no
two are alike.

 

Like the snowflakes
that blanket the spinning earth

When seasons change
and weather varies,

Everything on earth
reflects your wisdom in diversity.

 

And so I sing your
praises, my God, with many voices

Offering all kinds
of hymns and songs

Sung in different
keys and tempos and harmonies.

 

I bless your Name
and power revealed

Through countless
cultures and varied tongues

And different races
and beliefs, a sacred symphony.

 

A veritable garden
of splendid humanity

A motley patchwork
of people’s faces

Creating a  holy mosaic to your glory.

 

Joseph Veneroso

15 Reasons to Use Apple Cider Vinegar

 

Here's a great reminder of what apple cider vinegar can do for you...take a look!

http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-5875/15-Reasons-to-Use-Apple-Cider-Vinegar-Every-Day.html