Seasons of the Soul

The Rope

This is a great message for us all:

http://www.ticz.com/homes/users/bob/The-Rope/The-Rope.htm

Autumn Print edition of Seasons of the Soul now Available

Shameless Plug:

If you enjoy reading the blog, you may also enjoy subscribing to the print edition of Seasons of the Soul. A quarterly newsletter of inquiry and ideas, Seasons of the Soul is an ongoing source of inspiration, designed to awaken you to the best of yourself and to alert you to what is happening of value in the world around. It is easy to take with you as you wait for appointments, ponder the meaning of the universe, or for stimulating reading in the bathroom!

As the holiday season is upon us, you may have people to whom you would like to show appreciation or acknowledge without spending a fortune. Seasons of the Soul is a thoughtful and unique gift, enjoyed by many people who have gone on to give it is a gift to others. Best of all, it still only costs $12 a year (4 editions).

If you would like to have your own subscription or give it as a gift, please e-mail me for details. Visionofthegrail@aol.com And in the meantime, many thanks for your readership! If you enjoy this blog, please share it with your friends. It's nice to have a place to come where what you read lifts your spirits, offers a moment of laughter, or gives you something to think about!

Cheers!

Kathleen,                                                                                                              

Article by The Dalai Lama in Washington Post

My Vision of a Compassionate Future

By The Dalai Lama
Sunday, October 21, 2007; Page B01

Brute force can never subdue the basic human desire for freedom. The thousands of people who marched in the cities of Eastern Europe in recent decades, the unwavering determination of the people in my homeland of Tibet and the recent demonstrations in Burma are powerful reminders of this truth. Freedom is the very source of creativity and human development. It is not enough, as communist systems assumed, to provide people with food, shelter and clothing. If we have these things but lack the precious air of liberty to sustain our deeper nature, we remain only half human.

In the past, oppressed peoples often resorted to violence in their struggle to be free. But visionaries such as Mahatma Gandhi and the Rev. Martin Luther King Jr. have shown us that successful changes can be brought about nonviolently. I believe that, at the basic human level, most of us wish to be peaceful. Deep down, we desire constructive, fruitful growth and dislike destruction.

Many people today agree that we need to reduce violence in our society. If we are truly serious about this, we must deal with the roots of violence, particularly those that exist within each of us. We need to embrace "inner disarmament," reducing our own emotions of suspicion, hatred and hostility toward our brothers and sisters.

Furthermore, we must reexamine how we relate to the very question of the use of violence in today's profoundly interconnected world. One may sometimes feel that one can solve a problem quickly with force, but such success is often achieved at the expense of the rights and welfare of others. One problem may have been solved, but the seed of another is planted, thus opening a new chapter in a cycle of violence and counter-violence.

From the Velvet Revolution in the former Czechoslovakia to the popular pro-democracy movement in the Philippines, the world has seen how a nonviolent approach can lead to positive political changes. But the genuine practice of nonviolence is still at an experimental stage. If this experiment succeeds, it can open the way to a far more peaceful world. We need to embrace a more realistic approach to dealing with human conflicts, an approach that is in tune with a new reality of heavy interdependence in which the old concepts of "we" and "they" are no longer relevant. The very idea of total victory for one's own side and the total defeat of one's enemy is untenable. In violent conflicts, the innocent are often the first casualties, as the war in Iraq and Sudan's Darfur crisis painfully remind us. Today, the only viable solution to human conflicts will come through dialogue and reconciliation based on the spirit of compromise.

Many of the problems we confront today are our own creation. I believe that one of the root causes of these manmade problems is the inability of humans to control their agitated minds and hearts -- an area in which the teachings of the world's great religions have much to offer.

A scientist from Chile once told me that it is inappropriate for a scientist to be attached to his particular field of study, because that would undermine his objectivity. I am a Buddhist practitioner, but if I mix up my devotion for Buddhism with an attachment to it, my mind will be biased toward it. A biased mind never sees the complete picture, and any action that results will not be in tune with reality. If religious practitioners can heed this scientist's advice and refrain from being attached to their own faith traditions, it could prevent the growth of fundamentalism. It also could enable such followers to genuinely respect faith traditions other than their own. I often say that while one can adhere to the principle of "one truth, one religion" at the level of one's personal faith, we should embrace at the same time the principle of "many truths, many religions" in the context of wider society. I see no contradiction between these two.

I do not mean to suggest that religion is indispensable to a sound ethical way of life, or for that matter to genuine happiness. In the end, whether one is a believer or a nonbeliever, what matters is that one be a good, kind and warmhearted person. A deep sense of caring for others, based on a profound sense of interconnection, is the essence of the teachings of all great religions of the world. In my travels, I always consider my foremost mission to be the promotion of basic human qualities of goodness -- the need for and appreciation of the value of love, our natural capacity for compassion and the need for genuine fellow feeling. No matter how new the face or how different the dress and behavior, there is no significant division between us and other people.

When I first saw a photograph of Earth taken from outer space, it powerfully brought home to me how small and fragile the planet is and how petty our squabbles are. Amid our perceived differences, we tend to forget how the world's different religions, ideologies and political systems were meant to serve humans, not destroy them. When I traveled to the former Soviet Union in the late 1970s, I encountered widespread paranoia, even among ordinary people who feared that the West hated them so much that it was ready to invade their country. Of course, I knew this was mere projection.

Today, more than ever, we need to make this fundamental recognition of the basic oneness of humanity the foundation of our perspective on the world and its challenges. From the dangerous rate of global warming to the widening gap between rich and poor, from the rise of global terrorism to regional conflicts, we need a fundamental shift in our attitudes and our consciousness -- a wider, more holistic outlook.

As a society, we need to shift our basic attitude about how we educate our younger generation. Something is fundamentally lacking in our modern education when it comes to educating the human heart. As people begin to explore this important question, it is my hope that we will be able to redress the current imbalance between the development of our brains and the development of our hearts.

To promote greater compassion, we must pay special attention to the role of women. Given that mothers carry the fetus for months within their own bodies, from a biological point of view women in general may possess greater sensitivity of heart and capacity for empathy. My first teacher of love and compassion was my own mother, who provided me with maximum love. I do not mean to reinforce in any way the traditional view that a woman's place is confined to the home. I believe that the time has come for women to take more active roles in all domains of human society, in an age in which education and the capacities of the mind, not physical strength, define leadership. This could help create a more equitable and compassionate society.

In general, I feel optimistic about the future. As late as the 1950s and '60s, people believed that war was an inevitable condition of mankind and that conflicts must be solved through the use of force. Today, despite ongoing conflicts and the threat of terrorism, most people are genuinely concerned about world peace, far less interested in propounding ideology and far more committed to coexistence.

The rapid changes in our attitude toward the Earth are also a source of hope. Until recently, we thoughtlessly consumed its resources as if there were no end to them. Now not only individuals but also governments are seeking a new ecological order. I often joke that the moon and stars look beautiful, but if any of us tried to live on them, we would be miserable. This blue planet of ours is the most delightful habitat we know. Its life is our life, its future our future. Now Mother Nature is telling us to cooperate. In the face of such global problems as the greenhouse effect and the deterioration of the ozone layer, individual organizations and single nations are helpless. Our mother is teaching us a lesson in universal responsibility.

The 20th century became a century of bloodshed; despite its faltering start, the 21st century could become one of dialogue, one in which compassion, the seed of nonviolence, will be able to flourish. But good wishes are not enough. We must seriously address the urgent question of the proliferation of weapons and make worldwide efforts toward greater external disarmament.

Large human movements spring from individual human initiatives. If you feel that you cannot have much of an effect, the next person may also become discouraged, and a great opportunity will have been lost. On the other hand, each of us can inspire others simply by working to develop our own altruistic motivations -- and engaging the world with a compassion-tempered heart and mind.

Welcome Wind!

The wind has been very active this Fall. Storms have buffeted us earlier than normal. Yet, in observing the trees and the dying leaves, it always amazes me that Fall is a time when nature does her job unfailingly. Weak branches, old leaves...all things that would linger on their own, are given assistance by the glorious wind. Of course, it is unsettling with a large tree out my window. But each time the storms come, and I become afraid….I look at the tree, and its branches sway gracefully as gusts of wind pass through them. The tree is sturdy. It’s an old pine that’s been on this mountainside for over 40 years. I had it pruned a couple years ago, and asked the tree people if I should consider cutting it down because it might fall. They were surprised. “Why? The tree is healthy. It’s designed to withstand wind, and rarely do these type of trees fall on the mountainside unless they are diseased.”

The tree shelters the house from hot sun in the summer, and gives home to birds and other small animals. I love to go out and look up at its outstretched branches...inviting and reminding me that nature is right here even in the midst of suburbia. Yet, every time it is windy, there is always a little knot in my stomach. One day I realized how much I want to  control all the variables to make sure everything will be safe and secure. Yet, in life there are no assurances. The winds of change blow with the seasons. If we are sturdy, we can withstand the elements. When we have things we cling to that need release, life will bring circumstances to  prune our branches...to cast off the dead leaves that keep new growth from occurring. And once we’ve done our part, rather than trying to control, if we can only remember to open our arms as the pine tree does...to welcome life in all its seasons, knowing there is something much vaster and greater at work.KJ
From Seasons of the Soul 2002

Emergence of the Feminine and The Anastasia books by Vladimir Megre

An interesting phenomenon took place as the calendar rolled over to the year 2000. We moved from an influence of the mental/will/individuality/Patriarchy dominance that is represented by the #1, and is a necessary component to the building blocks of life, to the nurturing/connecting/intuitive/Feminine principal that #2 represents. And since the change in millennium, we’ve seen some gradual indications that the feminine aspect of existence is beginning to stand center stage. We see the fermentation of outrage against the way women and children throughout the world have been treated, with actual programs that are helping to raise awareness and offer basic things like education to girls in third world countries. We have also seen female candidates running for the highest office in countries where that has not been possible. In Germany, the first female Chancellor has been elected. In France, a woman ran a close race, and in the United States, there is a strong possibility that a woman will be a candidate for President.

Amidst this, in the spiritual realm, we’ve seen the rise of female gurus in the Hindu tradition. We see more and more vocal female nuns in the Buddhist tradition, and we watch the struggle as conservative Christian churches face the demand by people for female ministers and priests. Times they are a-changing, and with them, the backlash, resistance, and fear of what opening doors to the Feminine will mean take place. But make no mistake, this tide of change is happening, and we will all be touched and transformed through the years by the inclusion of this important contribution to our wellbeing and quality of life.

During 1996 in Russia, something untoward was happening. A businessman who visited the taiga of Siberia, was introduced to a young woman named Anastasia, who had remarkable abilities and knowledge that far surpassed anything that modern man or woman exhibits. Through a series of meetings that border on fanciful fiction, this man began writing about his experiences with the enigmatic individual who told him about life, about love, about how human beings were truly designed, and where we got off track in our evolutionary process. Anastasia introduced the author, Vladimir Megre, to a life of complete integration and interdependence with nature, where human beings and animals related to one another in love and care. He saw how children were brought into life to be nourished and allowed to bloom into the incredible beings they were meant to be, and he was shown how governments and educational systems have fallen into a mindset that traps human potential and keeps it from creating the Garden of Eden that is ours to have.

The books that emerged from Vladimir Megre’s series of interactions with Anastasia are riveting. One does not know whether to take the whole thing as fantasy, or to see beyond our own pre-conceived ideas of what life is to open ourselves to a fresh perspective of what indeed is possible for us as a species. There are seven books now available in the United States that have been carefully translated to give the English reader the full impact of the Russian context. In Russia and other parts of the world, over eleven million of the books have been sold, and there are movements of people forming communities to create a place in which children are nourished as God given gifts, where nature is held as a partner, not enemy, and where life is filled with mutual respect and appreciation for the gifts of each person. This flies in the face of the industrial revolution model. It calls upon us to reach to a higher octave of our innate abilities, and to the Divine aspect of our nature. It calls us out, and Anastasia challenges us to wake up…to reawaken the blueprint we were given as an original intention.

As I read the books, I would have flashes of clarity. “Yes!” Somewhere inside, I sensed the validity of what this woman shared. Her lineage went way back thousands of years to the Vedas. Her people had ancient wisdom that modern humans have lost, and that predated Egypt’s golden age. When the great library of Alexandria was torched, we lost contact with our roots, yet, the wisdom of the ages was handed down generation to generation through Anastasia’s lineage.  She demonstrated gifts that seem impossible save through the art of special effects. Yet, they are real. And they are possible for us all when we reactivate centers within ourselves and remember who we truly are.

Technology is shown as the shallow arbiter of human interaction that it is. Related to what is possible, we are engaged in child’s play – and we do not recognize the destructive energy we’ve released within the technology we’ve created, because it was not crafted through our Divine nature, but through logic and the intellect alone. Anastasia’s message is heart centered. Yet, this is not love and light in a mushy sense of the word. It is dynamic, powerful, and life altering stuff.

To get a better flavor of the books, I suggest you go to the publisher’s official website,
www.ringingcedars.com , where you can read excerpts of each of the seven released books. If you are ready for a different life view to add to the one you now hold as sacred, read these books. Your perception of life, society, and the way we raise our children will never be the same. This information is transformational, and worthy of consideration. After all, where are we headed now as a world? Might there be a better way? Anastasia believes that there is, and that is why she has given this information to us all at this pivotal moment in history. Perhaps it’s time to begin enacting life through herstory! KJ

The Anastasia series
By Vladimir Megre
Ringing Cedars Press
www.Ringingcedars.com

The seven books now available in the series are:
Book 1: Anastasia
Book 2: The Ringing Cedars of Russia
Book 3: The Space of Love
Book 4: Co-creation
Book 5: Who Are We?
Book 6: The Book of Kin
Book 7: The Energy of Life
FORTHCOMING:
Book 8, Part 1: The New Civilisation
Book 8, Part 2: Rites of Love

Trusting the Journey

Recently, three friends moved to the Bay Area. Each believed they were coming for a specific reason, only to find that what they came for did not materialize. Each of the friends dealt differently with the disappointment. One felt betrayed. One got mad, and the third saw life as a continuing adventure.

The first person saw herself victimized by unfairness. “Just my luck!” she would say, projecting a cloud of gloom and victimization. She became passive and withdrawn, waiting for something outside of herself to make everything right. She was unable to accept what happened, and would not take action to do something different. She spent her time nursing her hurt.

The second person assigned blame to others for things not working as he expected. He was unwilling to look at his lack of planning as part of the problem, and took out his anger by attacking others. He did not ask what  was to be learned from the situation, but continued to make decisions based on anger and emotional responses in the moment. As a result, he became reactive rather than pro-active and remained locked in the blame game. 

The third person realized that the reason she moved here was obviously not why she was here. She set about to find clues as to the purpose for being in the Bay Area, and began immersing herself in all the  personal growth activities she could find. She was open to possibilities, willing to extend herself to them, and as a result,  made incredible connections, achieving major breakthroughs within herself. She recently joined a spiritual community...something she always wanted to do, but thought could never happen. She trusted the journey, and although could have been equally or more disappointed than her two friends who at least have family and friends in this area, she is the one who believed that there is a greater plan unfolding, and that her requirement is to trust in the journey and pay attention to the clues.

I think this is an important example for us all. Everyone has major disappointments at one time or another, yet when we see life as an adventure, a wrong move becomes a right move, and we affirm ourselves and the bigger picture by finding the gift in the roadblock and the opportunity in the obstacle. The message is that we must trust the journey.
From Seasons of the Soul 2001

Light and Shadow

Q. Life is hard. I am studying art, and I come from a dysfunctional family. I want to run away from my life. Help!

A. When we  recognize the possibility....to realize that life is often filled with the illusion of joy and sorrow....always the play of shadow and light....we can realize, as the artist knows, that without the shadow, you have no contrast. There would be nothing to hold our focus or attention to give the etching of character and substance.

Our lives are the canvas. The incidents within our lives provide the shadow and the light. How we apply them to our canvas is our contribution...our artistry. Let us make of ourselves a true work of beauty....no matter how many shadows there might be! KJ

"God is not some person outside ourselves or away from the Universe. He pervades everything... He abides in our hearts and is nearer to us than the nails on our fingers."
                                ~Mahatma Gandhi

Letting Go

by Gay Hendricks

I'd been involved for a couple of years in a struggle over a house. It was a house I didn't want but couldn't let go of. In fact, it was a house I'd never wanted to buy in the first place.

Carol, the woman I was with at the time, had taken a major fancy to it, but I thought it was ugly and too expensive. I eventually gave in to her wishes, mainly because I wanted her to be happy.

In those days I was under the woefully mistaken impression that things like real estate could make people happy. Later I would come to see that buying an ugly house I didn't want was a way to avoid facing an even uglier truth lurking inside me: I didn't want to be in the relationship anymore. Finally I left the relationship, but the house became a source of conflict that dragged on and on.

When Carol and I split up we had accumulated an amount of equity well over $100,000 in today's money. I wanted her to buy my half or sell the house so I could get my money out. She wanted to keep living in the house but only had $10,000 of the $50,000 she needed to buy me out.

Stalemate.

And so it dragged on for months, then a year.

Each month I'd go through one of life's least fun experiences: having to make my half of the payment for a house I didn't like and didn't live in. I felt the pinch even more as my relationship with Kathlyn deepened. When we began living together, all we could afford was a tiny rental; from the moment we moved in, we couldn't wait to move out of it. The only person that seemed to be happy was Carol. She got to live in a house she liked and only had to pay for half of it! As time wore on, the minor satisfaction of making Carol happy dwindled and devolved into a bitter envy.

Bitterness and envy were two emotions I hadn't spent much time feeling in my life, and I didn't wear them well. One day I was full of angry thoughts about Carol and the house, and to soothe my fevered mind I sat down to meditate.

During meditation I was visited by a revelation. An image popped into my mind of a river flowing around a boulder. In that image was embedded a powerful insight: money is really only a form of energy. I realized that my attachment to "getting what I was entitled to" was a massive energy block, a boulder in the flow of my river. I was holding onto a house I didn't want until Carol came up with the full $50,000. By doing that I was blocking my own energy flow and, in a twisted sort of way, staying attached to Carol.

A radical question formed in my mind: What if I simply gave her my half of the house for whatever she could pay? I wondered if this act of giving would free up the energy flow, so that the money would come my way through some other means. It seemed like an outrageous idea when viewed through the filter of logic, but it seemed so intuitively right that I decided to act on it. Later that day I told Kathlyn what I'd realized.

She gulped when I told her I was going to let go of the house, because it represented my only tangible asset at the time. However, she immediately understood the money-is-energy insight and agreed that letting go of the house was the right way to go. I called Carol's attorney and asked him if she still had the $10,000. He said she did.

"Okay," I said, "I'll give her my half for the ten grand."

"You will?"

He sounded astonished and skeptical.

"Yep," I said, "She likes the house and deserves to live in it. I'll make the $40,000 some other way."

He asked me what I meant, and I explained my insight about money and energy. He listened politely, although I imagine he thought I was either crazy or on drugs.

"I'll draw up the papers right away," he said.

Almost as soon as the ink was dry on the deal, I began to experience a new level of abundance in my life. A book contract came through, along with a substantial offer for a long-term consulting contract with (believe it or not) the U.S. Army. They wanted me to help bring innovative counseling to the staff of their drug and alcohol treatment programs.

When all was said and done, I ended the year with well more than the $40,000 I'd given away in the house deal. Best of all, Kathlyn and I found a wonderful new home in the neighborhood we wanted to live in. All ended well for Carol, too: she got married to a man who liked the house just fine.

The most important part for me was receiving the gift of a miracle that had lasting consequences in my life. In addition to understanding how the world of energy actually works, I also got a powerful tool for navigating through this new world. I learned that any significant incompletion acts like a boulder in a river. The river has to flow around it to get where it wants to go. One or two boulders may only hinder the flow, but pile up a few more and you start to dam the river. It doesn't take long for that dammed river to overflow its banks and get diverted toward a completely different destination.

The way to get the flow going in the right direction again is by completing any significant incompletion. The act of completing something, particularly if it has an emotional charge, is a remarkably powerful way to increase your abundance of love, money, health, and anything else that's important to you. You really have to see it and feel it to believe it.

Gay Hendricks

Gay Hendricks is the author of Five Wishes: How Answering One Simple Question Can Make Your Dreams Come True. You can visit his website by going to: www.hendricks.com

Staying Centered

We live in a time of dramatic changes and multiple stress factors. Regardless of what is happening in our personal lives, there is a level of tension that underlies action. In the populated areas it is more pronounced, because the stress level is also fed by news of the latest fear scenarios. In our personal lives, we may be feeling things in a more pronounced way, making mountains out of mole hills, or taking things to extreme. Even our joy might be magnified.

It is in these times that the ability to find our center is important. Through the bombardment of whatever, reaching a space that is not determined by the outer world or our emotional state of being, is essential. When we feel ourselves moving out on the edge of potential despair, crisis, fear - whatever pulls us - we have to make a conscious leap back into the center. And the trick is how to do that.

First of all, if the crisis is an emotional reaction to whatever we are confronted with, we may not have much choice but to engage in the immediate response. The key is to remember that behind that reaction is a space of tranquility. So as we express our feelings in the moment, we are equally aware that it is not the whole truth, nor the real space that we choose to occupy. If we were to liken this to a tree, the center of the tree would be the place to which we return. The emotional reaction would be us on a branch, out on a limb. We have climbed there in the moment, but will go back to the trunk which is the solid, stable part that upholds everything else.

So we can do this when we are confronted by fear, with momentary bad news, disappointment, tragedy - with all of the things that tend to make us feel alienated, confused or at a loss. Just as we are  told that a major El Niño is going to affect weather patterns in a dramatic way for the next year or so, we can see the effects of our own internal and external storms in life. There are periods that are more stressful than others, just as there are times of more grace than others.

The key is to recognize all appearances in life that cause extremes as "weather." Our true nature is the residing aspect found in the quiet centered place of our being. It is our task to be mindful, to be conscious (even in our "unconscious" moments), and to find our way back to that space that provides nourishment and poise – our internal home.

Whether through meditation, prayer or affirmation, we are required to take action to return to the center. It does not happen automatically until we reach a level of detachment whereby we are consciously aware and practicing serenity even in the midst of chaos all around us. But, before we reach that stage, we have to find our way back again and again. To do so is to develop a strong spiritual muscle that will uphold us in the times to come!KJ

From Seasons of the Soul 1998

Kids and the Bible

The following were supposedly written by children related to the bible. Regardless of who wrote them, they are today's funnies.

1. IN THE FIRST BOOK OF THE BIBLE, GUINESSIS. GOD GOT TIRED OF CREATING THE WORLD SO HE TOOK THE SABBATH OFF. 

2. ADAM AND EVE WERE CREATED FROM AN APPLE TREE.

NOAH'S WIFE WAS JOAN OF ARK. NOAH BUILT AND ARK AND THE ANIMALS CAME ON IN PEARS. 

3. LOTS WIFE WAS A PILLAR OF SALT DURING THE DAY, BUT A BALL OF FIRE DURING THE NIGHT. 

4. THE JEWS WERE A PROUD PEOPLE AND THROUGHOUT HISTORY THEY HAD TROUBLE WITH UNSYMPATHETIC GENITALS. 

5. SAMPSON WAS A STRONGMAN WHO LET HIMSELF BE LED ASTRAY BY A JEZEBEL LIKE DELILAH. 

6. SAMSON SLAYED THE PHILISTINES WITH THE AXE OF THE APOSTLES. 

7. MOSES LED THE JEWS TO THE RED SEA WHERE THEY MADE UNLEAVENED BREAD WHICH IS BREAD WITHOUT ANY INGREDIENTS 

8. THE EGYPTIANS WERE ALL DROWNED IN THE DESSERT. 

AFTERWARDS, MOSES WENT UP TO MOUNT CYANIDE TO GET THE TEN COMMANDMENTS. 

9. THE FIRST COMMANDMENTS WAS WHEN EVE TOLD ADAM TO EAT THE APPLE.

10. THE SEVENTH COMMANDMENT IS THOU SHALT NOT ADMIT ADULTERY. 

11. MOSES DIED BEFORE HE EVER REACHED CANADA   
THEN JOSHUA LED THE HEBREWS IN THE BATTLE OF GERITOL.

12. THE GREATEST MIRICLE IN THE BIBLE IS WHEN JOSHUA TOLD HIS SON TO STAND STILL AND HE OBEYED HIM.

13. DAVID WAS A HEBREW KING WHO WAS SKILLED AT PLAYING THE LIAR. HE FOUGHT THE FINKELSTEINS, A RACE OF PEOPLE WHO LIVED IN BIBLICAL TIMES.

14. SOLOMON, ONE OF DAVIDS SONS, HAD 300 WIVES AND 700 PORCUPINES. 

15. WHEN MARY HEARD SHE WAS THE MOTHER OF JESUS, SHE SANG THE MAGNA CARTA. 

16. WHEN THE THREE WISE GUYS FROM THE EAST SIDE ARRIVED THEY FOUND JESUS IN THE MANAGER. 

17. JESUS WAS BORN BECAUSE MARY HAD AN IMMACULATE CONTRAPTION. 

18. ST. JOHN THE BLACKSMITH DUMPED WATER ON HIS HEAD. 

19. JESUS ENUNCIATED THE GOLDEN RULE, 

WHICH SAYS TO DO UNTO OTHERS BEFORE THEY DO ONE TO YOU. 

HE ALSO EXPLAINED A MAN DOTH NOT LIVE BY SWEAT ALONE.

20. IT WAS A MIRICLE WHEN JESUS ROSE FRO M THE DEAD AND MANAGED TO GET THE TOMBSTONE OFF THE ENTRANCE. 

21. THE PEOPLE WHO FOLLOWED THE LORD WERE CALLED THE 12 DECIBELS.

22. THE EPISTELS WERE THE WIVES OF THE APOSTLES.

23. ONE OF THE OPPOSSUMS WAS ST. MATTHEW WHO WAS ALSO A TAXIMAN.

24. ST. PAUL CAVORTED TO CHRISTIANITY, 

HE PREACHED HOLY ACRIMONY WHICH IS ANOTHER NAME FOR MARRAIGE. 

25. CHRISTIANS HAVE ONLY ONE SPOUSE. THIS IS CALLED MONOTONY